3 things I've noticed about myself now

Recently, I participated in a work planning and performance course, and realised a few things about myself as a result. Mostly, that I have changed quite a bit in the last 10 months. These are not sad things. They are just things.

1. I'm not passionate about anything, anymore, and I used to be. Once upon a time I had firm opinions about the place of books and literacy in libraries, and I would have sweary thoughts about how libraries use social media, and I very much believed that there was a huge difference between 'leaders' and 'managers'. But then sometimes I had feelings about brands of chocolates, and the best ratio of jam to peanut butter on bread, so maybe "passion" is overrated. One thing I do know, though, is that these days I don't have a motivator. There isn't anything that "inspires" me to get up in the morning and give my best all of the time. I get up out of habit and self-will. But I am getting up.

2.  I have the best work/life balance I've ever had. Ironically, I've never been less engaged in work. It is just a job. Once, that would have worried me. Now, I'm finding that it's okay, and it very likely makes me normal. It doesn't mean that I don't give the job everything I've got while I'm there. I do, because I have a very strong work ethic. But I leave it there when I go home at the end of the day. It's my new thing.

3. Working in libraries used to be a vocation for me. I truly thought that it was what I was called to do. I think I did well. But it doesn't define me, any more. Nor do I let it consume me. I'm still figuring out what the next step will be. And that's okay, too.

 Overall: I'm doing okay.